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SGL Notes Newsletters>
Solid Ground Learning Notes - vol. 149
June 24, 2008
Two weeks ago, John and I had the good fortune of going out for supper with a very wise man. He has raised 3 lovely children and now goes to India, whenever he can, to do mission work.
He had some words of wisdom that I would like to share with you.
The Serenity Prayer
We were discussing my teenage daughters and my frustrations as they make their way through this hurricane of teenagehood, when he reminded me of the prayer that AA has adopted; that is, The Serenity Prayer.
It is knowing what I can change/what I have the right to change and separating that from the things that I cannot change or more correctly, I don't have the right to change.
My kids/our kids need to know that they are free to develop into who they are meant to be. They are not meant to be duplicates of us. AND it is very arrogant to suggest that we have it right. . . that our way is the only way.
This combined nicely with last week's Super Nanny episode where the nanny chastised the parents for focussing on the negatives, rather than seeking out their children's gifts.
So Becca pushes my buttons and fights me on many things . . . but she has a dry sense of humor, a unique fashion sense and expresses herself very well with her writing.
Or maybe if we change the liability labels to assets . . .
Irresponsible . . . can be . . . carefree
Unpredictable . . . could be rephrased as . . . flexible
Impulsive . . . is . . . spontaneous
Loud . . . enthusiastic
Stubborn . . . persistent
Poor planner . . . present-oriented
Willful . . . determined
Argumentative . . . committed
Tests limits . . . risk-taker
Impatient . . . eager
Explosive . . . dramatic
and in Becca's case . . .rebellious . . . could be seen as . . .non-conformist. I most definitely don't want my daughters to be doormats or people who don't think for themselves.
So . . . thank you Richard for redirecting my thoughts in this challenging time of raising children.
The Serenity Prayer
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
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